I'm dying. I have lived a schizophrenic bunch of years being treated with heavy tranquilizers and rebelling in a typical fashion by lopping off interesting parts of my life. I found an old pill bottle of lithium and decided to try it out and when i ran out, the animals started noticing. I have a bad feeling about all this. I had a lot of personal power before I had to fight with my family on grounds of mental stability, but i was constantly earning my keep. Now i'm literally living on the earth's tab fucking birds just started chirping. I'm a leader born and died and I don't know what to do with myself I have so little contact with the outside world because all the recent contact i've had is prescribed. It simply doesn't count to me except to fill the abyss with something appropriate.

Virgo

94010

At the moment my interests are as lonely as i am: Cigarettes and coffee. The only thing that really keeps me busy is writing in strange formats. I'm fleshing that out with a newly purchased copy of finnegan's wake.

I've developed a bad habit of telling people my sob story for lack of alternative directions. I'm so used to people checking in on me that my social space reflects it.

I spent 2 years with a pain in my chest reflecting my heart. I would cry for no reason, or every reason. It was the rage of a caged animal in person and i'm not sure what i've moved on to, except acquiescence. I'm still teaching myself to breathe again, since my body was always on the side of the mystery.

My happiness is fleeting. Everywhere I go the weather is beautiful. I try not to stare. I'm saving those special moments for when i feel I've earned them. I kinda flipped all my interests and now take a minor pleasure in the things that don't belong. As if that were enough.

I met her on the street. She was a christian mystic and though her voice was soft she could hone its edges. I met her passing notes in class- sociology of religion- and when we walked together it was an exploration. She was waiting for her boyfriend to return but she couldn't ignore the tension in its reality.

i

when other people do it

too much

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Male

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oh gimme a break. Like it really matters when you've got the right person. How about a midnight run to the beach for a naked dive. how about an open mic. how about taking a class together.